by Karen Young (BSc)(Psych)(Hons)MastGestTher

503
VIEWS

How to Deal With Frenemies and Bullies – A Video

If you’re struggling with frenemies or bullies, you’re not alone. Here’s what you need to know … 

Transcript and Take-Aways

  • Adolescence can be a really difficult time socially for a lot of people, so if you’re doing it tough at the moment know that you aren’t alone, and most importantly, the tough times will end.
  • Some people can become hard work to deal with during adolescence – they can make your life miserable for no reason at all. There’s a reason for this, although of course none of that makes it okay.
  • During adolescence, it’s more important than ever for people to feel like they’re part of a group. As humans, we always need to feel part of a group. When we’re younger, the most important tribe is our family tribe. As we grow older this dependency will start to turn towards a peer tribe. Your family will still be as important as ever, but for a while you’ll be experimenting with discovering the independent adult you’re going to be.
  • For some people, the only way they can feel part of the group is to be the head of it, so they’ll put other people down to feel on top.
  • If you’re feeling like you don’t fit in, if you’re feeling excluded or lonely, know that it won’t always be like this. People grow up, and they change into decent humans. People won’t always be awful, and they won’t always be nasty, mean, and self-centered.
  • Hold on tight to who you are. Your experiences, your history, your beautiful flaws and imperfections will all make up the amazing adults you’ll be one day. You are who you are because of your history, not despite it. You’re who you are because of your flaws and your vulnerabilities and your differences. Not despite them.
  • It’s these vulnerabilities, and the mistakes that you make, and your differences that will make you interesting and will open the way for people really connect with you later on. None of us are perfect, and none of us want to be with people who think they’re perfect. We want to be with people who are real and honest about who they are, and who are able to come into relationships with an open heart and an open mind.
  • If you are struggling now, don’t change who you are. You are brilliant, and strong, and beautiful, and courageous. You’re amazing. There will come a time where you will feel surrounded by love and people who get you, and people who want to know you because of everything you are and everything you’ve ever been.

 

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karenyoung_heysigmund

Honestly isn’t this the way it is for all of us though?♥️

#childanxiety #parenting #separationanxiety

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Feb 5

Open
Honestly isn’t this the way it is for all of us though?♥️ #childanxiety #parenting #separationanxiety

karenyoung_heysigmund

Big feelings can be so beautiful. And so tricky.

We want our kids to know that all feelings are okay, and we also want to support them to handle those feelings in positive ways. This is going to take time. We were all born with feelings, but none of us were born able to regulate those feelings. That will come with time and lots (lots!) of experience.

In the meantime, the way we respond to their big feelings and the not-so-adorable behaviour it can drive, can be key in nurturing their social and emotional growth. So let’s talk about how.

Proactive Parents is a community event hosted by @mindfullaus . I’ll be providing parents, caregivers and educators with the skills and tools to better understand big feelings and the behaviour it fuels.

Understanding how to respond when young people are overwhelmed can drive calm and connection over conflict. Ultimately, our responses have enormous potential to build important neural pathways that will strengthen them for life.

This presentation will explore the powerful ways parents and carers can, quite literally, influence the strengthening of the brain in ways that will build self-control, emotional regulation, and resilience in their children for life.♥️

When: Sunday 25 Feb 2024, 10am-2pm
Where: West Gippsland Arts Centre, Vic
Buy Tickets here: https://sales.wgac.com.au/event/379:2410/379:3923/
(Or Google: karen young young people and their big feelings west gippsland)

View

Feb 5

Open
Big feelings can be so beautiful. And so tricky. We want our kids to know that all feelings are okay, and we also want to support them to handle those feelings in positive ways. This is going to take time. We were all born with feelings, but none of us were born able to regulate those feelings. That will come with time and lots (lots!) of experience. In the meantime, the way we respond to their big feelings and the not-so-adorable behaviour it can drive, can be key in nurturing their social and emotional growth. So let’s talk about how. Proactive Parents is a community event hosted by @mindfullaus . I’ll be providing parents, caregivers and educators with the skills and tools to better understand big feelings and the behaviour it fuels. Understanding how to respond when young people are overwhelmed can drive calm and connection over conflict. Ultimately, our responses have enormous potential to build important neural pathways that will strengthen them for life. This presentation will explore the powerful ways parents and carers can, quite literally, influence the strengthening of the brain in ways that will build self-control, emotional regulation, and resilience in their children for life.♥️ When: Sunday 25 Feb 2024, 10am-2pm Where: West Gippsland Arts Centre, Vic Buy Tickets here: https://sales.wgac.com.au/event/379:2410/379:3923/ (Or Google: karen young young people and their big feelings west gippsland)

karenyoung_heysigmund

We have to change the way we think about school. When we prioritise academics, it`s like building the walls - because that`s what we see - before fortifying the foundations.

So many teachers know this, but with the increased focus on reporting and academics, they aren`t being given the time and opportunity to build the relationships that will ensure those foundations are strong and steady.

This is why too many kids are falling down at school - not because they aren`t capable, but because the necessary foundations for them to do well haven`t been laid.

Schools are spending the resources anyway, but reactively on behaviour management, disengagement, reduced capacity to learn.

If we can steer those resources towards building relational safety, so kids feel more seen, valued, cared for, rather than less capable or clever, we`ll see a decrease increased academic success, greater engagement, less social struggles, and less behaviour issues. It`s just how it is.

First though, we need to value relationships and the way kids feel at school, even more than how they do at school. All kids are capable of their own versions of greatness, but unless they feel safe and cared for at school, we just won`t see what they are capable of, and neither will they.❤️

View

Jan 22

Open
We have to change the way we think about school. When we prioritise academics, it's like building the walls - because that's what we see - before fortifying the foundations. So many teachers know this, but with the increased focus on reporting and academics, they aren't being given the time and opportunity to build the relationships that will ensure those foundations are strong and steady. This is why too many kids are falling down at school - not because they aren't capable, but because the necessary foundations for them to do well haven't been laid. Schools are spending the resources anyway, but reactively on behaviour management, disengagement, reduced capacity to learn. If we can steer those resources towards building relational safety, so kids feel more seen, valued, cared for, rather than less capable or clever, we'll see a decrease increased academic success, greater engagement, less social struggles, and less behaviour issues. It's just how it is. First though, we need to value relationships and the way kids feel at school, even more than how they do at school. All kids are capable of their own versions of greatness, but unless they feel safe and cared for at school, we just won't see what they are capable of, and neither will they.❤️

karenyoung_heysigmund

We also need to make sure our teachers feel seen, safe, cared for, valued. Our kids can’t be the best they can be without them.♥️

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Jan 19

Open
We also need to make sure our teachers feel seen, safe, cared for, valued. Our kids can’t be the best they can be without them.♥️

karenyoung_heysigmund

Separation can be tough! Not just for our kiddos but also for the adults who love them.

As brutal as separation anxiety can feel, it also comes with transformative opportunities to strengthen your child and build their brave in ways that will serve them now and for the rest of their lives.

Of course we’d rather our young ones (or ourselves) never feel the tailwhip of separation anxiety, but so many young people are going to experience anxiety at separation from a loved one. It’s part of being human, but it doesn’t have to hurt.

As their important adult, you have a profound capacity to support them through separation anxiety and help them feel braver, stronger, and closer to you, even when you’re not beside them. Let’s talk about how.

This is information I wish every parent could have.

We want our children to feel loved and supported, but we also want to build their brave so anxiety doesn’t stand in the way of the important, growthful things they need to do.

In this 1.5 hour webinar, I’ll be presenting practical, powerful ways to build bravery when separation feels tough - at school, at bedtime, at drop-off - any time being away from you feels tough.

A recording of the webinar will be available to all registered participants for 30 days following the ‘live’ online event.

To register or find out more, google ‘hey sigmund webinar separation anxiety’ or see here https://www.heysigmund.com/upcoming-live-webinars/ ♥️

View

Jan 18

Open
Separation can be tough! Not just for our kiddos but also for the adults who love them. As brutal as separation anxiety can feel, it also comes with transformative opportunities to strengthen your child and build their brave in ways that will serve them now and for the rest of their lives. Of course we’d rather our young ones (or ourselves) never feel the tailwhip of separation anxiety, but so many young people are going to experience anxiety at separation from a loved one. It’s part of being human, but it doesn’t have to hurt. As their important adult, you have a profound capacity to support them through separation anxiety and help them feel braver, stronger, and closer to you, even when you’re not beside them. Let’s talk about how. This is information I wish every parent could have. We want our children to feel loved and supported, but we also want to build their brave so anxiety doesn’t stand in the way of the important, growthful things they need to do. In this 1.5 hour webinar, I’ll be presenting practical, powerful ways to build bravery when separation feels tough - at school, at bedtime, at drop-off - any time being away from you feels tough. A recording of the webinar will be available to all registered participants for 30 days following the ‘live’ online event. To register or find out more, google ‘hey sigmund webinar separation anxiety’ or see here https://www.heysigmund.com/upcoming-live-webinars/ ♥️

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